May 13

Look it up, it’s today. Today in 1939, the first commercial FM radio station began broadcasting from Bloomfield, Connecticut. The transcripts of that first broadcast have recently been found.

5:38am – WDRC-FM

TOM SAVAGE: HEY-OH! Welcome back to the Goofy Gil and the Savage Show. Beautiful day out here in Bloomfield, C-T. Hope everyone’s enjoying their commute, right Goofy Gil?

GIL SANDERS: You got it, Savage. Although the unemployment rate is 17.2% so a few of you are stayin’ home.

TOM SAVAGE: Oh, yeah! Gotta populate those Hoovervilles.

(stupid slide whistle noise)

TOM SAVAGE: Turning to the headlines, how ’bout them Nazis, huh, Goofy Gil? That’s a real bummer.

(sad trombone noise)

GIL SANDERS: Tell me about it, Savage. Those guys are the worst.

TOM SAVAGE: Well, we’ve invited in local comedian Jeff “The Cut-Up” Kutarsky to talk about that situation over there in Germany. Take it away, Cut-Up.

(JEFF KUTARSKY performs a routine called “Sieg Heil, Bitches,” which is an impersonation of Adolf Hitler with a flamboyant lisp that partly undercuts Hitler but is mainly homophobic)

TOM SAVAGE: Wasn’t that hilarious, Goofy Gil?

GIL SANDERS: That is great stuff. That line about the bratwurst just kills me. Cut-Up, tell us where Bloomfieldians can check you out.

JEFF KUTARSKY: I’m going to be at the Funny Bone on the 19th and then I do a weekly show at Maxie’s.

GIL SANDERS: I thought Maxie’s closed because of this horrible, crippling Depression we’ve got going on.

(“WAH-WAH” sound)

JEFF KUTARSKY: Nope, it’s back open thanks to a WPA grant.

GIL SANDERS: Alright!

(overplayed audio clip from a movie)

TOM SAVAGE: Well, we gotta go pay some bills but when we get back we’ll have Jorge the Magnificent, an adult hypnotist, who is going to be hypnotizing some local waitresses right here in the studio. It’s gonna get wild, we may get to see some ankle. Stay tuned.

(cuts to commercial about brill cream or something)

Dame Daphne du Maurier, an English novelist whose contribution to Western society is less in the books she wrote and more in the movies that those books inspired, was born today. Bea Arthur, American sex pot, was born today. Bobby Valentine, the former baseball manager who was once thrown out of a game, only to return to the dugout WEARING A FAKE MUSTACHE, was born today. 2008 Presidential candidate Stephen Colbert was born today.

Donald Dunn, a studio musician at Stax Records, the greatest label of all time, who played with the likes of Otis Redding and Elvis Presley, died a year ago today.

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